Banana-Based Ice Cream and Endless Innuendo
Parents, prepare for some awkward conversations
Making ice cream out of bananas sounds kinda like one of those late-night, we-swear-this-is-possible-of-you-ACT-NOW inventions up there with the Shake Weight and spray-on hair. Ice cream? From fruit? Next you’ll tell me you can make steak from garbanzo beans.
But if we’ve learned one thing this month, it’s that Daddy is always right.
Banana Daddy, that is, the new, banana-based soft serve dessert shop in Midtown that packs almost as much flavor into its soft serve desserts as it does innuendo into its dining room. It’s a brightly-colored dessertopia for the gluten and dairy averse, a place you can indulge in Instagrammable treats without completely negating your Barry’s class. And while I’ll stop short of saying you can’t tell the difference between Banana Daddy’s soft serve and the stuff you get at the boardwalk, it is a delicious, somewhat-healthier alternative.
Banana-based ice cream? You mean sorbet?
No, if it was sorbet, I would have called it sorbet. This is an intriguing process whereas ripe bananas are placed in a blender with coconut milk and pulverized like a Jake Paul hand-picked opponent. Eventually, they turn into a creamy mush, which has about the same consistency as bananas you forgot about ice cream. Does it taste the same? No, it does not. It’s less creamy and more banana-y, but the icy, tropical flavors feel more like vacation and less like diabetes.
The space: To say Banana Daddy trades on kinky innuendo would be like saying Donald Trump enjoys ruffling a few feathers. Don’t get me wrong, the place is absolutely family friendly, but if you get a call from your son’s school because he kept telling little Olivia “Cool Girls Eat Bananas,” you know where he got it. Ditto if your daughter starts walking around with a shirt that says, “Please lick responsibly.” Once you get past that, it’s a fun, colorful space that begs you to eat sweets. And the bathrooms are instantly atop the list for coolest in Miami.
What to eat and drink: Banana Daddy’s soft serve is serviceable on its own, and the swirling combinations of flavors are fun to explore. But it’s best when dressed up. The sundaes are the move, and the Daddy’s Classic with brownie bites, pecans, sprinkles, and chocolate drizzle is probably the best one. Though the Bad Bunny topped with spiced carrot cake, walnuts, and cream cheese is also a winner. The Gimme S’more is like a frozen campfire, topped with toasted marshmallow, graham crackers, and chocolate chips.
There’s a whole case of pastries that Banana Daddy makes daily; the owner told me they get in at like 4 am to make the things. The banana bread and chocolate cherry scone were my favorites. Some are gluten-free, too, so if your naturalist told you’re “allergic” you’ve got options here.
Don’t miss: The Bad Bunny sundae. Not only because it’s a carrot cake lover’s dream, but also because the cease and desist letter from Benito’s lawyers is going to have this off the menu before Easter.
Perfect for: Dessert! Or cooling off after a long day battling the Midtown Target.
Expect to pay: $10-15 per person. Bananas ain’t cheap, yo.
How’s the parking: Suck it up and park in the Shops of Midtown garage.
@eatbanandaddy // 3415 NE 1st Ave., Midtown